When burnout hits, it can be hard to know where to turn or what to do. Here are eight tips to help you cope:
We all know self-care matters — but when you’re a burned-out parent or caregiver, setting aside time to tend to your own body and soul becomes even more critical.
“Whatever is in the realm of possibility for you, I would encourage you to build nonnegotiable self-care into your schedule so that you do not wait until your proverbial tank runs out of gas,” says Nourmand. She recommends scheduling enjoyable activities as you would any other daily commitment.
Self-care doesn’t have to be expensive or time-consuming. Taking walk, soaking in a warm bath, or reading a good book can all be forms of self-care. Choose activities that feel restorative to you.
A stressful time (like, say, a global pandemic) isn’t the time to power through parenting alone. When you’re feeling burned out, it’s important to recognize your need for help — and reach out to others to get it.
Ask a friend or family member to babysit, or see if a neighborhood teen can play with your kids to give you a break. To take some responsibilities off your plate, check low cost household support websites that offer services like house cleaning, yard work, or running local errands.
Requesting help might also look like asking for more from your spouse, partner, or co-parent.
“Parents should acknowledge with one another the reality of their burnout, give each other elongated breaks, and talk openly about their needs,” says Neidich. “At this time it is not always possible to meet your co-parent’s needs, but talking about small ways to help each other through this phase can alleviate a great deal of tension.”
Step away from the calendar! Stripping your schedule of excessive or burdensome commitments allows for extra breathing room you may need right now. Ballet lessons, soccer practice, and book club can all make their way back into your family’s life when you’re feeling more refreshed.
“Meditation is one of the most powerful tools available to protect your brain and body from overwhelm,” says Neidich. “Meditation helps to protect your nervous system from the effects of stress by tapping into your body’s natural relaxation response.”
Not comfortable with a lengthy om session? Start small with a simple breathing exercise or a brief recorded meditation on Youtube.
You can even get the kids involved in an activity that’s beneficial for the whole family.
“Involving your children in meditation can actually help teach them a valuable life coping skill and can serve as a reset to the energy in the house,” Neidich says. “Parents who meditate with their children regularly often say that it is a new type of bonding where they can re-access the appreciation they have in the parent-child relationship.”
One simple way to reconnect with your inner self: Pick up a hobby! According to research from 2015, leisure time, such as time spent on a hobby:
Creative pursuits like painting, playing an instrument, or writing can all refill your emotional cup. Or you may find even greater rewards from hobbies that take you out of your usual environment.
“Doing an activity outside the home that brings you joy could help offset some of the burnout,” suggests Nourmand. “And if you’re feeling starved socially, then starting a hobby that involves a friend is a bonus!”
According to Nourmand, the right hobby can come with another hidden bonus for parents and caregivers.
“Getting back in touch with something that you loved doing when you were a child could actually help you connect with and relate to your children better.”
Let’s face it: The COVID-19 pandemic did a number on our social lives. If you’ve felt isolated from friends during the last 2 years, it’s probably contributed to a sense of burnout.
Maybe it’s time to get back in the social saddle by reaching out to friends.
“Spending time with friends offers an outlet to disconnect from the stressors of parenting and discuss your experiences,” Neidich encourages. “It also offers an opportunity to support one another and a normalization that everyone is struggling right now.”
For some people, the idea of spending time inside with a group of people or even with one other person may still feel uncomfortable or may not work for health reasons. That’s OK, too. Other ways to reconnect might include meeting up outside – like for a picnic or a walk, scheduling a Zoom or phone call with a friend or group of friends, or even just sending a friend a text or a message on social media.
Taking a vacation or day off from the kids is never a bad idea for staving off burnout. But for those times when can’t leave the house, you consider creating a private sanctuary in your home.
Is there a space you can turn into a kid-free zone? Perhaps you designate your bedroom as your personal haven or choose a special chair on the patio that’s just for you. Let your kids know that when you’re in this place, it’s the equivalent of a do-not-disturb sign.
For some parents, a DIY approach to overcoming burnout simply won’t cut it. If your chosen coping mechanisms don’t seem to be decreasing feelings of helplessness, frustration, or overwhelm, consider talking with a mental health professional.
Source: How to Cope With Parenting Burnout After 2 Years of COVID (healthline.com)
